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Som mamma till tonårsbarn måste jag ändå invända lite mot läroplanen i skolan idag. Missförstå mig inte, det är jättebra att barnen lär sig om verb, klassiska kompositörer som Vivaldi och olika sorters kol och dess kretslopp, MEN jag vill ändå flika in med några ämnen som man skulle kunna kalla "livskunskap".
Exempel på några ovärdeliga lärdomar följer nedan:
 
*Vad händer när toalettrullen är slut? 
-Svar: Den måste bytas ut omedelbart. Att låta den hänga kvar och skämmas på sin hållare, med bara en liten remsa kvar, innebär total katastrof för nästa person. I värsta fall är det en gäst som för att rädda sig själv tvingas gå igenom badrumsskåpet på jakt efter något att torka sig med.
Som tonåring (eller man) är det lätt att tro att rullen automatiskt fylls på över natten, men jag kan säga att riktigt så enkelt är det inte. Det är en person som manuellt flyttar över den tomma rullen ner i pappersinsamlingen och byter till en ny. Vanligtvis är det mamman i familjen som löser detta problem, om hon av någon anledning inte tar uppdraget på allvar eller befinner sig på annan ort kan kaos uppstå och bytet tom rulle/ ny rulle uteblir helt. Då samlas istället tomma rullar på golv, bakom element, på badkarskanter och bakom kranar och har man riktig otur havererar fästet till element/ kran och anordningen släpper med stora kostnader som följd. 
Denna kurs finns på helfart en termin, 100 hp.
 
*Hur blir kläderna rena?
-Svar: Dom måste åka tvättmaskin i lämplig temperatur. Kläder som är sunkiga av tonårssvett blandat med dyr parfym gillar att samlas i högar i olika delar av huset, gärna under sängar, bakom byråer eller ibland också i garderoben bland det rena. Detta är inget Anticimex tar sig an, utan kräver en manuell rörelse där man helt enkelt skyfflar upp all smutsig tvätt och lägger det i en behållare kallad "tvättkorg". Därifrån följer olika alternativ beroende på hur många curlingborstar som finns i familjen, men det klassiska är att dom vuxna tröttnar på att tjata och tvättar, viker och lägger in dom rena kläderna i garderoben. Det vanligaste är att detta sker endast om kläderna redan finns i tvättkorgen, i övriga fall skyfflas dom in till tonåringens rum där dom ligger på golvet tills dom är för små.
Denna kurs kan endast läsas på halvfart på grund av kursens omfattning, 75 hp.
 
*Jag har inga pengar, men måste ha den här dyra tröjan, vad gör jag?
-Svar: Skaffa dig ett jobb. Ett jobb betyder att man ska befinna sig på sin arbetsplats vid angiven tid, utföra sysslor enligt överenskommelse fram tills en viss tid många dagar i rad. Oftast måste detta ske utan tillgång till sociala medier, möjlighet att ta selfies med öppen mun och vill det sig riktigt illa kanske man måste låsa in telefonen i sitt skåp i omklädningsrummet och inte kolla på den igen förrän arbetsdagen är slut.
Om detta sköts på ett bra sätt genererar det något som kallas "lön", en i förväg bestämd summa pengar som kommer in på kontot i slutet av månaden. Du kan också vara sjukskriven från jobbet på grund av utbrändhet, ont i levern eller näsblod, detta genererar lite mer än den lön du skulle fått om jobbat, men det kräver läkarintyg. Telefonnummer till läkare som utfärdar dessa intyg hittar du via googlesöket "intyg latjävel".
Denna kurs läses på helfart fyra terminer, 200 hp. Är du sjukskriven har du redan all kunskap och behöver inte gå i skolan mer, fortsätt leva på andras skattepengar bara.
 
Detta är endast ett axplock av olika kurser som borde klämmas in i högstadiet/ gymnasiet, kanske kunde man korta sommarlovet med ett par veckor för att ha livsskola? 
Det är ju val om ett par veckor så det är väl i sista minuten, men jag ska nog ställa upp. 
 

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